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Condolence When should you send a condolence card? How do you write a thoughtful and memorable condolence note? What common sympathy expressions should you avoid? A good condolence letter has two goals: to offer tribute to the deceased and to be a source of comfort to the survivors. * Keep it brief. What you write needn't run to several pages; often just a few personal lines will do. A bereaved person has difficulty concentrating anyway, so a shorter letter will be easier to digest than a longer one. Remember that your goal is not to change what has happened or to erase the grief of the bereaved. Rather, your purpose is to acknowledge the person's loss, express your sympathy and offer some measure of comfort. * Avoid euphemisms such as "passed away" or "gone on." Use the word "died." * Mention the person who died by name. * If you knew the loved one who died, share a happy memory. A mourner's greatest fear is that the one who died will be forgotten. Even if you didn't know the person well, you can still express sincere sympathy and support to the one who is bereaved. * Enclose a picture or keepsake if you have one. * Respect the uniqueness of this loss. All mourners believe that their loss is the worst that could happen to anyone and that no one else can know their particular pain - and they are right. We cannot possibly know how they feel or measure just how much they have lost, so it's important to avoid such statements as, "I know how you feel," even if you've experienced a similar loss. Better to say, "I cannot imagine what this is like for you." * Avoid sharing accounts of your own losses, which shifts the focus away from the mourner, who right now deserves your total empathy and attention. * Resist the temptation to offer advice, and don't tell people how they should or shouldn't feel. There is no right or wrong way to mourn, and everyone's grief journey is unique. * Don't preach or offer spiritual advice. When a loved one dies, it is normal to question everything we thought we believed in, including God. Those in mourning need time to question and sort out their own personal and spiritual beliefs. * Don't try to turn the death into something positive with statements such as, "At least she had a good long life," or "At least he didn't suffer." Nothing you can say will make this death more acceptable to the bereaved. * Be specific if you wish to offer help, and mention a task that you are willing to do and when you are free to do it, e.g., "I have two free hours next weekend, and I'd like to come over and mow your lawn or take your kids to a movie." It's unlikely that a bereaved person will know what he or she wants or needs from you. * Know that it's better to be late in writing a condolence letter than to never send one at all. A note that comes later, when everyone else has returned to their own lives, may be even more welcome and appreciated by the one who is bereaved. Our heartfelt condolences go out to you and your family. Our thoughts are with you. You have our deepest sympathy. With deepest sympathies. You have my sincere sympathy. He/She will always live on in our hearts. Thinking of you in your time of loss. She/he was a lot of things to many people and will be missed tremendously. You are in our thoughts and prayers during this difficult time. May your strength prevail to help you through this difficult time. Our deepest sympathies are with you in your time of need. May your memories be your comfort. We are very saddened to hear of your loss. During this excruciating time, we want you to know we are here for you. Words cannot express how sorry we are to hear of your loss. In your time of need, we hope you know we will always be there for you. May there be comfort in knowing that someone so special will never be forgotten. I send my heartfelt condolences to your family. |
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I am Asif Qureshi. I am the founder of Qureshi University and the Global Democratic party. Al-Haj Ghulam Rasool Mattoo of Nigeen died:Is that correct? How old was he? Where and when did the death occur? What was the exact location and circumstances of the death? I send my heartfelt condolences to your family. Thinking of you in your time of loss. |
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Where are his grandchildren, children? Where are they living now? What is his/her/their contact information? Forward this to them. I send my heartfelt condolences to his family. Thinking of you in your time of loss. How old was he? What was his age at the time of death? Where and when did the death occur? What was the exact location and circumstances of the death? What was the day, date of death? Did he die in the hospital or at home? What was the diagnosis and cause of death? Did he have any other health problems? Was it a premature death or natural death? Was it a premature death or death due to aging? Medical doctors can prolong life. Medical doctors cannot make a person live forever. No one can make a person live forever. Death should not be premature. What are the details of the funeral? Who attended the funeral? How many people attended the funeral? Will there be any day of mourning like 4th or 40th day after the death? How many days of mourning will there be? Communicate this to all. If there is a death and I am unable to attend the funeral, my sympathies are there. Maintain regular communication. Update as soon as possible if there is any issue. |