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What are examples of essential social skills? What do you know about politeness? Do you know anyone who is not polite? What do you think are some good manners? What are examples of nonessential social skills? |
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What are examples of essential social skills? Politeness is an essential social skill and work ability. What do you know about politeness? Polite Adjective (politer, politest) Derivatives Politely Adverb Politeness Noun What does polite mean? Showing regard for others in manners, speech, behavior, etc. You are polite when you show good manners. Politeness is best expressed as the practical application of good manners or etiquette. Having or showing behavior that is respectful and considerate of other people: Being polite is a matter of etiquette; it's about respect, and being considerate of people's feelings, culture, and values. It does not seem difficult, but for many people it remains a challenge. While some people have no interest whatsoever in politesse, if you're reading this you're probably wondering how you can improve your etiquette. At the very least, you might want to know how to avoid being rude or boorish, which at the very least, can put off the people around you. Being polite is also a good way to make friends. 'Politeness' may be defined a dext'rous management of our words and actions, whereby we make other people have better opinion of us and themselves. Try to have respectful friends. Always remember we are judged by the company we keep. Respecting people is a necessity in life. 1 Be gentle, not forceful or insistent. This doesn't mean you need to act like a meek, quiet pushover. It means that when you do something, offer something, or make a request, you do it without pressuring the people around you and making them feel like they're being pushed into a corner. •For example, if you're having a conversation, it's one thing to ask a question or offer your opinion, but it's rude to push the matter when someone has expressed discomfort (verbally or non-verbally) about the subject. •Even if you're trying to help, like offering to pay for lunch or wash the dishes, don't be too insistent. If the person says "No, thank you, I've got it" then say "Please, I'd really love to help." If they still say no, then let it go. They obviously want to treat you, so let them, and return the favor some other time. 2 When in doubt, observe others. How are they greeting and addressing each other? What are they doing with their coats? What kinds of topics are they discussing? Different settings require different standards of formality, and those standards often define what is polite and what is not. •A work-related dinner, and holiday gathering, a wedding, and a funeral will all demand a different, but generally somewhat more formal tone than a party with a group of friends. 3 Be nice. Always be courteous, as you might meet this person again in another setting and wouldn't want to have caused negative memories that would give you a bad standing. If someone annoys or even insults you, don't get into an argument. Say "Let's agree to disagree" and change the subject, politely debate, or simply excuse yourself from the conversation. 4 Start a conversation by asking questions about the other person. Try not to talk about yourself too much—if they want to know (or are polite) they'll ask. Be confident and charming. Do not hog the conversation, that is arrogant and boorish. Look interested and listen to the answers. •Don't look over the person's shoulder or around the room when they are talking, or let your eyes linger on the hot new guest who just walked in. That implies you are distracted or not interested—that your conversational companion is not important or interesting enough to bother paying attention to. 5 Shake hands firmly and look your acquaintance in the eye when doing so. You might want to practice this a bit so you don't squish people's hands, depending on how strong you are. That would make them feel uncomfortable. Beware especially when shaking hands of women who are wearing rings. Too much pressure can be very painful. •Remember too that many people with an "old-school" etiquette background (especially if you are in Europe) find it inappropriate to offer your hand for a handshake to a lady or an older gentleman if you are a gentleman, or to an older lady, if you are a lady. Always greet the other person first, but wait for them to extend their hand. On the other hand, if you are the older person or lady, keep in mind that if you do not extend your hand, the other person may feel rejected, as he or she is not permitted to shake your hand. Usually this situation only takes half a second in checking whether the other person is moving towards you for a handshake. Be alert. •Do not approach someone with an already outstretched hand. That is pushy. If you want someone to know you are moving towards them, establish a firm eye contact and smile, maybe opening your arms a little (bent at the elbow) to make a welcoming gesture. 6 Know the proper dinner etiquette. For silverware, go from the outside, in. Place your napkin on your lap, and do not add anything to the table that was not there when you got there (cell phone, glasses, jewelry). Put your purse between your feet, under your chair. Women should not apply makeup at the table. It is rude and demonstrates a lack of refinement. If you want to fix your makeup or check if something is in your teeth, go to the restroom. 7 Have a laugh which shows you are having fun, without being loud. Loudness either indicates arrogance or insecurity. A charming polite person makes another person feel good. Keep this goal in mind, be considerate of other people's needs and opinions. Don't make derogatory remarks towards any kind of ethnic, political or religious groups under any circumstances. 8 Be graceful and show elegance. Carry yourself smoothly, with a sense of calm, yet involved in the moment. People will notice this subtle charm and this will help you greatly. 9 Be aware that etiquette and manners vary depending on the cultural region you are in...be sure to study the local customs before you travel! 1 Respond to the situation appropriately. For many social situations, there are general guidelines for polite conversation. The ability to listen to what the other person is saying, and responding thoughtfully, without sarcasm, insult, or being overly-casual, are key to smooth interactions. Here are some examples: 2Personal greetings. If you're speaking with peers, say hello by name, and if appropriate, extend the greeting to be welcoming. The polite response is in keeping with the greeting. For example: •"Good morning, Jess." •"Good morning, Peter." •In this case, both the greeter and the greeted keep it short, professional, and courteous. Here's another example, extending it a bit: •"Good morning, Jess, good to see you today." •"Thank you, Peter. It's good to see you too." •If you're greeting somebody above your peer group—perhaps your boss, an important person, or somebody else who "outranks" you socially, it's best to keep it formal. For example: •"Good morning, Jess." •"Good morning, Mr. Jones." •If Mr. Jones says "Call me Peter," by all means do. But do not do so until invited. 3 Phone greetings. Politeness when it comes phones depends entirely on the situation. If you're in a business environment, how you answer the phone will depend in large part on your position in the ________. The way you answer an outside call from a potential customer might be something like this: •"Hello, ABC Corporation, this is Mr. Applemore speaking. How may I help you today?" 4 Don't bark. There is a trend, for internal calls, to answer by barking out your department. Even if it's common practice, it's far better to actually speak politely: •"_______." This might as well be a robot answering the phone. It conveys no sense that there's anybody on the line that cares about anything. A better approach would be: •"_______, this is Eleonore. How can I help you today?" 5 Introductions. This common situation often leaves people wondering what to say, and who should say it. Here are some guidelines. •Formal situations. In formal situations, you don't "introduce" people, you "present" them. There is a hierarchy involved: •The younger or less-accomplished person is always introduced to the older or more accomplished person: •"Mr. Elder, may I present Mr. Green?" •Informal situations. Informal situations have much the same guidelines as formal situations—younger to older, less accomplished to more accomplished, women to men—but without the worry of societal banishment should you get it wrong! Also, you can "introduce" one to another, or omit the word altogether, thus: •The polite response when you are introduced is simply, "How do you do?" •Mr. Jones, may I present Ms. Abernathy?" Ms Abernathy says "How do you do." Mr. Jones may respond as desired. Tips •Remember to say please and thank you. •Be polite to the servers. •Try not to interrupt people when they're talking to someone else or in the middle of something. •It is always much worse to be caught in a lie than to tell the truth. •Don't put elbows on the table or reach over people for the salt and pepper. Always ask if they can please pass it to you. •Never "help yourself" unless whoever it is, you are with, says you can. •Tailor your behavior to the occasion. You can be more loose at a family party then at a society dinner. Behavior What do you think are some good manners? 30 Manners Everyone Should Know #1: When asking for something, say "Please." #2: When receiving something, say "Thank you." Be especially appreciative and say "thank you" for any ______ you receive. #3: Do not interrupt people who are speaking with each other unless there is an emergency. They will notice you and respond when they are finished talking. #4: If you do need to get somebody's attention right away, the phrase "excuse me" is the most polite way for you to enter the conversation. #5: When you have any doubt about doing something, ask permission first. It can save you from many hours of grief later. #6: Keep negative opinions to yourself, or between you and your friends, and out of earshot of others. #7: Do not comment on other people's physical characteristics unless, of course, it's to compliment them, which is always welcome. #8: When people ask you how you are, tell them and then ask them how they are. #9: When you have spent time at a _______, remember to thank your _____ for having you over and for the good time you had. #10: Knock on closed doors -- and wait to see if there's a response -- before entering. #11: When you make a phone call, introduce yourself first and then ask if you can speak with the person you are calling. #12: Use a quiet voice inside, especially in places like _______. #13: Never use foul language in front of people if you don't know if it will bother them. #14: Don't call people mean names. #15: Do not make fun of anyone for any reason. Teasing shows others you are weak, and ganging up on someone else is cruel. #16: Even if an event is boring, sit through it quietly and pretend that you are interested. The performers and presenters are doing their best. #17: If you bump into somebody, immediately say "Excuse me." #18: Cover your mouth when you cough or sneeze, and don't pick your nose in public. #19: As you walk through a door, look to see if you can hold it open for someone else. #20: Help others out when you can. #21: When someone helps you, say "thank you." #22: When someone asks you to do something, try to do it without grumbling and with a smile. You have a right to say no, you should be polite and offer a good reason if you do. If someone asks you to do something that feels dangerous or wrong, it's okay to say no and not be polite to keep yourself safe. #23: Use eating utensils properly. If you are unsure how to do so, ask someone to teach you or watch what people you respect do. #24: Keep a napkin on your lap; use it to wipe your mouth when necessary. #25: Don't reach for things at the table; ask to have them passed. #26: Chew with your mouth closed. #27: If you hurt someone, say "I'm sorry" and try to find a way to make it better. #28: Don't hurt people on purpose. #29: Don't use people's things without permission. #30: Treat others the way you'd like to be treated. * Remember: Children count as people. What do you think are some bad manners? Can you think of some good manners that are bad manners in another _______? What are the titles of some books on manners? Have you ever read them? What are some good manners for using a cell phone? What are some good table manners? What are some good party manners? Is kissing in public good manners? Do you say "hi" to people even if they are strangers? Why? Why not? Do you listen to other's people conversations on the street? Do you think it is good manners to hug or kiss another person in greeting? Do you let people pass you when you are driving in your car? Is it considered a good manner? Do you honk your horn to people when you drive? Why are manners important? Do people have more manners now or in earlier times? Can manners affect your success in life? How? What's the best way to teach manners to children? What culture do you think is the most polite? Explain. What advice would you give a _______ visiting your _______ who would like to show good manners? What things about manners in the ______ do you find difficult to adjust to? Is there anything about manners in the _______ that you prefer to manners in your ______? When you walk , what side should you be on? When you are entering an elevator, what should you, do if there are people getting out? How closely do you think good manners are related to ________? Can the idea of good manners inhibit people's natural sense of fun and inhibition? To what extent is the idea of good manners used to _________ behavior in society? What manners have you found acceptable in here that would be bad manners in your ________? Do you let people pass you when you are driving? Is it considered a good manner? What manners are found only in your ________? Why do we have manners? What are some manners in your ________ that no longer exist? Do you think staring at somebody that looks totally different from you is good manners? Why do you think people stare? Can manners effect your success in life? How? What culture is the most polite? Why do you think so? Work etiquette tells the individual how to behave when dealing with situations in a working environment however trivial the situation is. Manners What is good behavior? What is bad behavior? Were you well-behaved as a child? Why do some children seem naturally well-mannered, while others seem difficult? Were you a well-behaved child? How do you raise well-behaved children? What influences you to make good choices? Have you ever not tolerated someone's behavior? Is there any behavior that you would not find acceptable? What are some examples of bad behavior? What is he worst behavior you have seen? Would you teach your child to "hit back" at school if somebody hit him? How can we teach our children good behavior? Are words or example more important? Are you influenced by what you see on TV? Or by what you read? Do friends influence you? Can you influence your friends? Is it important to surround yourself with good people? How can friends have a bad influence on you? Can music influence your behavior? Is it important to only watch wholesome TV shows and only read good books? How has the media affected society? Has TV made society better or worse? How does religion influence people's behavior? Do you care what other people think of you? Do you care about the _______ behavior of a politician? Can you judge a politician by how he behaves toward his family? Do you give up your _______ life when you become a politician? Should people behave differently with friends than with family? Do you treat people who are close to you better than strangers, or vice versa? Does the behavior of well-known people, such as celebrities and politicians, affect how average people behave? Does ________ affect people's behavior? Who do you admire? Do you try to be like this person (or people)? Are there historical figures you admire? Who is affected by your behavior? In what ways have the choices of others affected you? Does your happiness depend on the behavior of others? Should you always be on your best behavior? Will we be judged for our behavior? Do you believe in a God who punishes bad people and rewards good people? Does it always pay to be good? How do you act when you are happy? Do you like being around happy people? Should people act on their feelings? If you are in a bad mood, can people around you tell? Do you believe we have a moral obligation to act happy, even if we do not feel happy? Is it possible to change one's behavior? Have you changed anything about your behavior? Have you started good habits? Have you broken bad habits? What are some ways to change your behavior? Do you set goals to improve yourself? What behaviors are expected from children towards their parents? Do the clothes you wear affect your behavior? Should school teachers wear casual clothes? What behaviors are expected from university and college students? Are bad people bad because of circumstances or choices? What about good people? Do you think there is such a thing as an evil person, or just a sick person? Can bad behavior lead to crime? Should parents be held responsible for their children's behavior? What would you do if you saw somebody else's child behaving badly in public? Should some parent give medicine to their children to calm them down? Can you think of a behavior that is 'good' behavior in one culture and a 'bad' behavior in another culture? How would you behave in a hospital? What is the strangest thing you have ever done? Should children be punished in public? What kind of punishment do you think is the most effective? What does "misbehavior" mean? What can we do to prevent or discourage __________ Is there a behavior considered a 'good' behavior in one culture and a 'bad' behavior in another culture? If yes, give examples. Can we teach our children good behavior? How can we teach our children good behavior? How do children acquire good behavior? What would you do if your child behaves badly in public? What would you do if you saw somebody else's child behaves badly in public? Would you spank (To slap on the buttocks with a flat object or with the open hand, as for punishment) your child for bad behavior? What would you do if you saw somebody spanking their child behaves for bad behavior? What should you do with a child who has very bad behavior? Would you teach your child to "hit back" at school if somebody hits them? How should we punish children who commit crimes? What behavior is not acceptable among friends? Is it OK to show negative types of behavior when you are angry? What behaviors make you feel good? What behaviors make you feel angry? Should children be encouraged to ask questions in class? How can teachers stop "bullying" at school? Have you ever got embarrassed by your ________ misbehavior? What is the right behavior to use in a ________? How should you behave when you see someone you don't like? What is good behavior? What is the right behavior to use in a ________? At school? At a ________? Can you think of a behavior that is 'good' behavior in one culture and a 'bad' behavior in another culture? Can we teach our children good behavior? How can we teach our children good behavior? How do children acquire good behavior? Would you spank your child for bad behavior? What would you do if you saw somebody spanking their child for bad behavior? Is it acceptable for parents to spank their children? |
| Age-specific social skills (Social Sciences) |
| Table manners with spoon and fork |
| Telephone Manners |
| Social skills appropriate at the table include: |
| Good manners |
| Here are further guidelines. |